hot in the city, hot in the city tonight ...

... tiz boiling in Lost Anglo tonight ... back from nine glorious days in Nebraska. I took my little nephews for 24 dollars. They need to learn the value of a dollar. 14 in Poker, and 10 bucks for a sprint race. I love beating youths out of money that is obviously near and dear. had a very close Great-Santini basketball game with my teenaged nephew. Beat him by a "cunt hair." I actually said that to him. Ugh. I've gotta watch it! It just felt like the perfect, base thing to say in the moment ... to let him know he was a man, and I would be vile in front of him if warranted ...

... spent an idyllic day on a lake with the family (one amongst many idyllic nebraska daze) where my dad was shamlessly angling to get in a boat of teenagers in bikinis ...

... did the Hollywood Death Cab today, and enjoyed being banging out the 'tainment. had some mouthy teens I simmered down, and made up a new film called "Bim Boodle" about a burglar with poor eyesight.. Told everyone to watch for it, coming out soon. After the tour peeps asked me about this film. (is "peeps" on the out-list? I like it's brevity, I'm going to keep wearing it until it comes back in style). I told folks that the film should be out in summer 2006.

... had fantasies all day about being on the Death Cab and having a big-wig take my tour and install me as the new ruler solely on my genuis. I just got my review from a nit-picky nerd who noticed none of the beauty of my tour and all of the crap that no one gives a shit about. The nerd's tour sux. Boring, dull, and horrible. These people would go in the purge, once I've installed myself as the malevolent despot. I imagine firing Dirk and telling a cheering work force he's gone for good! Pay raises for everyone! I am cheered! I am LOVED!!!! The Hollywood Death Cab tour gets written up in the LA Weekly as the only thing relevant in Hollywood.

During my Boozerelli's coronation party, I eleborate to my loving prols that every joke is sacred. No longer will ONE customer's complaint cut a joke that's entertained thousands. The tour is not a corporate christmas party where every line is scrutinized so as not to offend the corporation. No, the tour is bonafide entertainment product, and treated as such: like a movie, like a TV show. Current and competitive. I will help you my Death Cab mates! I will take your tour not to notice that you didn't say which room John Belushi died in, but to notice that you have the potential for some very funny bits, or a character you could play that would get you laffs. Finally, I am carried from the room on the arms of the surging blob of tour guide humanity, and installed as the most loved ruler to ever brandish an amplified voice.