Extras--Free Booking Service--Work Everyday--SAG

That was the title on a Craig's List posting. The title of my post:

Extras--Free Booking Service--Work Everyday--SAG

Scented bait, colorful, bobbing on top of the water. What extra wouldn't open his big mouth at that, eye's bulging with appetite. Once the hook is sunk deep in your gullet:

NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION

Lady's be advised: Russel (Russ) Goens is a non-union background loser. He makes a good first impression but is simply looking for a "sugar mama" to support him. If you reject him, he WILL slander your name on sets everywhere. He will (and has) made it a campaign to visously blackball you from sets. He is emotionally unstable and vindictive. Lady's AVOID Russel (Russ) Goens.

A NOTE TO THE AD's. Russel (Russ) Goens is a notorious slacker. He will try to hide in his car or figure out a way to hide in holding. He has been known to smoke a fat one with the crew so some of them will assist in hiding him. Keep an eye on Russel (Russ) Goens when he is on your set. He is a slacker.

I can't believe this will last much longer on Craig's List, but Craig might want to check his list every now and then. Holy Hell! Russ has seriously pissed off some lassie! Mr. Goens is going to be a mite surprised when he hears about this.

Russ is accused of being a slacker, a smoker and a sugar momma solicitor. The lady calls him "emotionally unstable and vindictive" meanwhile she posts this on Craig's List.

Poor Russ deserves his day in court, but it would seem that once again the internet has given a case the shortcut to the court of public opinion.

The Company you Keep

I've always wanted to meet and talk to real prisoners, just not in a real prison.

Appparently, my dream may have been realized. Read this from Background Beat, the best source for all things Extra on the net:

http://www.backgroundbeat.com/index.php?showtopic=1722

Would it be impolite of me to start asking possible candidates on sets if they're felons?

All my pals ...

Sat down and watched the Love Boat movie I did with Dana Grant (http://no-biz.blogspot.com/2004/11/happy-birthday-dana-grant.html).

Because of all the passengers, and the close proximity they are to stars, it was a good chance to see a lot of wacky backies. Including me. I show up about four times in the movie, two very clear. So clear, I can the pores in my nose. They looked like oily wading pools. Glad I didn't see this on the big screen, that would have ended it for me.

One of the folks I described in the link above was VERY visible. He had his crazy man stare too, and reminded me of the crazy things he was saying on set: "The Olson's are sluts! That's how they got their jobs!" Hmm, sluts at 5 years old?? Wow! And there he was on screen, nice, slow-moving shot, and very clear. It was effective to have his crazy-man stare, because it read as an intense gaze directed at Dana Grant, whom we thought had been lying to us. I wonder how often this is the case -- an extra is used for some purpose that makes thematic sense to the movie-goer, meanwhile the reason the extra actually looks that way is entirely nefarious.

Also saw the fussy bow-tie-guy. Several times. Bow-tie-guy had kept jumping around to get more screen-time and eventually got busted by the A.D.s. They made him stay put, and did him a favor -- all his visibility came from the same location.

Watching a movie you saw being filmed is very involving. I think you can watch the worst movie, as long as you were on set. I think a program in this country should be set up, so that people are always extras in movies to insure that movie attendance goes up.

bye bye Muslim Hay, hope to see you another day

Last day on Kid Napped. I had a melt-down moment this a.m. over the tiniest of things. But, like splitting protons, it releases vast quanities of energy.

I took the bus in today, trying to be a good citizen. My cars fine, just figured there was a direct and speedy bus, I'll use it. You're not supposed to have food on the bus, so I hid a squeeze bottle of mustard in my coat. It was the only place to put it, and I had it in a little Carl's Jr. bag. Beat-up bag, but serving it's purpose. A couple of bus drivers look at my bulging coat, but I mange to keep the mustard. Bus journey complete, I walk to the extra's meeting place with my mustard. I've been ruminating about having this good brown mustard on my hot dog. They've been having hotdogs all the time on set, but with crappy yellow mustard. Ha ha, I've got gourmet brown mustard.

We load onto the extra's van, and the van is filled. This one Abe Lincoln dude I met the other day (http://no-biz.blogspot.com/2006/01/napping-kids.html) cannot get on the bus, too full. I lean forward to offer him my seat, and as I do, the bag, holding the mustard falls out from coat. With one fell swoop, honest Abe picks up the trashy looking fast-food bag, chucks it in the nearby trash, waives to me that it's fine, he'll get the next bus and shuts the van door. Clang!

[Fast dolly-in to a Close-up of my anguished faced. ]

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

"MY MUSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!"

I swore to myself violently, in the manner of all good crazy people, and then rocked back and forth trying to come to terms with the loss of my brown mustard.

Wardrobe Witch got hers today. She recoiled at touching Mark de Marquis, the afore-mentioned Fiddler of Background. ( http://no-biz.blogspot.com/2006/01/napping-kids.html).

Mark de Marquis says: "Really, I'm not vermin."

The witch pouts: "Well the last shoot I was on, everyone got dysentery."

"Well, then you're in the wrong business, you're in close quarters with a tent full of MEN"

At which point all the extras started sneezing and coughing on cue. It was thrilling, to see her face turn beat-red. Later, an on-set wardrobe person said she hated this woman after working with her for two daze. Weirdrobe Witch started trying to be nice to folks after that, a sad attempt to connect. She'll prolly go home blaming everyone for her misfortune, she's that kind of person. As my pa once said "If you always think everyone else is the asshole -- YOU are probably the asshole."

Later, we had a scene where we laffed at one of our Kid Nappers, who gets the tables turned on him. Every extra was using the fuel of that scene that had just happened in Wardrobe, one of our captors getting their comeuppance.

As I arrived at the extra's meeting place, before the tragic loss of my mustard, big fat pig guy immediately told me that his stereo had been stolen.

Not "Hi, how are you, hey, what's the deal" -- but an immediate declaration of the morning's misery.

"My stereo has been stolen."

He's a sad, sad, dude. Lots of folks hate him on set because he is constantly bitching, or talking to loud, getting us in trouble, but I'm starting to have a softspot for him. He's found himself trapped in a hideous frame, and he's to blame, so there's self-loathing, mixed in with the self-pity, all conspiring to keep him miserable. Yowch.

Another extra dude looks like 95. He's only 65, but he looks ancient, apparently he's on a new liver. Meanwhile he's at craft services pounding doughnuts, Dew, and smoking ciggies like there's no tomorrow. When he's asleep in holding, you are sure he's dead and making music with the angels. You have to admire his absolute fearlessness and recklessness. If you're gonna go, go BIG.

Another extra dude was having moral dilemas. He was going to have to kill one of our Kid Nappers in a scene, and he's against violence, killing, et al.

"Well maybe you picked the wrong business," seems to be the day's theme.

He's a fun dude, this morally-troubled extra dude, always jokey, former pottery maker, who's been having trouble selling his bowls. I counsel him to look in the eyes of the kid and give him a good send-off to hell. He shivers. I realize this is truly bugging him.

Most of the day was spent goofing off, and we were cut loose early afternoon, and a day early.

in car cerated

you wear prisoner garb long enuff, walk around do the same actions over and over, no chance of escape, get yelled at -- and you feel like an extra!

I overheard a nice convo today between the key grips about working on The Slave Movie. Stanley Sphongeymeyer did a critically acclaimed slave movie, and there were many reports of mistreatement of extras. The one key grip claimed that the black female star first made a racial slur about him being a whitey, and then when they all got drunk together on a charter flight, started hitting on him because he had his balls pierced, and word had gotten around set. She then hired him when she did a short film, a year later. He would not admit to his pal if anything happened, but it sounds like it to me.

Lots of gay prisoner jokes, "fresh fish," etc., and I have to grin and bear it. It's not worth revealing my proclivity for such a short-term thing.

my pal, the miscreant wrangler seemed to make a concious effort not to talk to me today. weird. first day, all happy to see me, have I now floated into the miasma of extra-land? it's hard to maintain friendships on a set, it is very heirarchal and classist. Although on this set, we all eat lunch in the same tent. That's kinda okay.

This other dude who IDed as a pinhead the other day, has apparently been souring extras left and right. I spoke to one today who heard pinhead espousing that killing all the people in jails would be good. Pinhead looks like a pinhead, it's a tired bit of name-calling, except for his actual physical pinhead, and ninny-ish qualities. He couldn't get a gate open today, and that was his one extra job, and it fucked up a take. Got a big laff from all the other extras. His face reddened. He reminds me of a chatty-ninny from a 40s movie -- the kind that would always be chasing a girl he didn't deserve, and then Jimmy Stewart would come along.

darling, darling little darling on set today. kid actress. dolled up in cute costume. her dad said the best thing to me "she's having a lot of fun, so were okay with it." No careeer talk, plotting and scheming, just wanting to make sure his daugther is enjoying her youth. There was a bunch of feathers that came out of a pillow, and with every take, she would pick up the feathers for the prop guy. You could hear her little high-pitched voice over all the set noise, during down-time.

Also, much love to Muslim Hay. All day Hay had to give gutteral cries of losing his life and his daughter, while being quartered. He did it at least 10 times, and each take felt like actual loss.

Oh, I found a gold watch in the alley the day before. So far, no one has claimed it, it might be mine, they said they would give to me on Friday if that was the case.